I was a good student in high school. I did all that was expected of me: I got the best grades and passed every class with flying colors.
And I sacrificed my physical and mental health to do so.
Then I started college… and my struggles with anxiety and depression decided to show me how crippling they could really be.
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t keep up with my workload. I could see my grades dropping, watched unmet deadlines fly by, and lost the ability to sleep at night, feeling like every low grade I got was proof that I myself was a failure.
And then, to my horror, I failed a class. And another. And another.
I felt like I was ruining my entire future and there was nothing I could do to save it.
Eventually, and fortunately, I came to the decision to let myself off the hook: I didn’t need the best grades. Not if it was destroying me. All I could do was the best I could do.
It was okay to fail some assignments. It was okay to skip over the smaller ones, so I could spend more time on the ones that had the biggest influence on my overall grade.
And, in the semesters I was spiraling downwards, it was okay to fail a class. I simply retook it when I was in a better headspace.
It didn’t make me a failure. It was just important that I survived.
As an adult who’s now working on healing from everything I suffered as a student, let me tell you: it’s okay if you sacrifice your grades a bit for your mental and physical health. You will not be a failure for doing so.
You will still have a bright future.
I love you. Please stay healthy.
Favorite Panel: Yu’s first puddle splash. Literally the cutest thing I’ve ever drawn. I’m in love.
This week’s letter can be found here
Olivia Forero 